Baking, Workouts, and Blessings

 Hi everyone,

I hope your week has been good. We were blessed with such good weather this week, one day even got up into the 80's! Blue skies, sunshine, it's been really nice.

Sharaya and Ally came over last weekend and Ally made crepes for us! She is the crepe master, I tell ya. She makes them from scratch and they are so good!

Beth and I went downtown on Monday to see the Veterans Memorial they have down there. I'm grateful our little town has something to honor the brave men and women of the military.

Then we headed down to the waterfront for a while.

For a couple weeks now Beth and I have been talking about making banana bread and we finally did it! I forgot to take a picture when it came out of the oven so you'll half to accept our half-eaten loaf. We actually made two, one with chocolate chips and one with walnuts.

We're still going to the gym. Learning about the different machines. It's something we've never done before but we're really enjoying it. Beth always goes to this one first and I get on the treadmill. 

That's about all from here. I hope you have a great weekend. And you know, I pray you feel truly loved, cherished, wanted. Because you already are. This weekend and this coming week I pray you tangibly feel it.

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace. Num 6:24-26

Honoring

Today is Memorial Day, when we honor those who gave their lives in service to our country. My grandpa fought in WWI, my dad in WWII, but they both came home.

I have no experience with the military, or war. I can only watch the images on TV and grimace and gasp at what those men and women have gone through.

We grieve with their families today and pray for those who are still out there serving and risking their lives for our freedom.

You're probably seeing this a lot because today it rings true more than any other -

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends. John 15:13 

God bless everyone in our military. And comfort the families of those who didn't come home. I thank you for your service.

Shopping Like A Kid vs An Adult

You ever have one of those nights where you wake up very early and you just lay in bed thinking about life? Happens to me fairly often but I had an interesting one a couple months ago. It was a Thursday morning. Grocery Shopping Day.

I was thinking about Beth and the choices she makes while shopping. I thought about how it all seemed to start when we bought her a refrigerator, and some kitchen cabinets and a microwave. And we gave her the authority to start buying her own food.

And I thought about all the times, the years I've spent trying to advise her on what foods to buy, what foods are healthy and which foods are not. All the times I've coached her, encouraged her, got angry at her, educated her. And how tired I was of doing it. And how tired she was of hearing it.

There comes a time in your adult child's life where you have to take your hands off and allow them to make choices. Whether they're good choices or bad choices. Even choices that are different from what you would make in that situation. At some point you have to step back, and let your adult kids be adults. As hard as it might be. 

And as I laid in bed early that morning, I believe the Lord dropped an idea into my mind. An idea that might help Beth make better choices.

When we're kids we want the cookies and cake and ice cream and sugar. And we beg mom and dad to buy it for us. But as adults we realize those aren't healthy and we need to limit how much we eat of that stuff. 

I realized I've been trying to force Beth to shop like an adult. 

And we can't force anyone to do anything. Oh we can advise and encourage and educate, but we can't force. Not in a healthy relationship anyway. And shopping was becoming stressful for both of us.

So I apologized to her. Said I was sorry for trying to force her to buy certain foods. And I told her she's the only one who can choose what she's going to buy.

And a few times since then, as we're walking into the store, I remind both of us that it's that time again where we need to decide if we're going to shop like a kid or an adult.

And you know what? She's slowly making changes. And our grocery shopping is becoming much more fun!

Remembering On This Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day weekend and I'm remembering my mom even more this year. This Tuesday marks 20 years since she passed away: May 13, 2005. 

She married at 16, had two kids before she turned 19 and thought for sure she was too old and her life was over when she had me at 25.

She was elegant, trustworthy, and loved her family passionately. 

When my sisters and I were growing up she sewed all of our clothes. Every Easter brought new dresses, shoes and hats. She kept the house spotless and worked magic with the money my dad would give her to buy groceries each week. Meals weren't fancy but we ate well.

She married young (her mom was physically abusive) and never graduated from high school so when I started Kindergarten she went to night school and got her diploma. Even at that young age I remember being so proud of her.

She gave her heart to the Lord in her forties and walked with Him the rest of her life. She was only 69 when she died. 

I'm really missing her this year. I wish I could just sit down with her and talk about life. There's so much I understand now that I didn't when she was still alive. She would say things like: "The hardest part about raising kids comes after they turn 18." Or "Getting old isn't for sissies." I miss her advice. I miss her laugh.

If you're celebrating and/or remembering this year, I pray for peace, joyous memories and a very blessed weekend. 

There's Not a Lot Going On, So Why Am I So Busy?

Hi everyone, 

It dawned on me yesterday that I haven't posted in a while. Honestly, I'm in a season where it hasn't even crossed my mind. Yet when I think about everything I've been doing, it's not that much!

Looking through my phone for photos to share I realized I never showed you my classroom. We have a sensory room for kids who find our typical Sunday school classes overwhelming. The swing is the newest addition.

I snuck a picture of Beth at our coffee bar on Sunday. Every week she buys the same thing, a hot chocolate with soy milk and a fruit snack. 

I have an azalea in the backyard that has grown so much! We had a dog that used to pee on it when it was much smaller and it killed that part of the plant. I thought it was a goner. But then the dog passed away and now - it's probably been 10 years - it's gotten so big! I took this before it had bloomed completely. My watering can is there for reference.

Let's see... Diana sent this picture of Adelaide, they were going on a hike.

She's growing so tall! We get to see them again in August and I can't wait! First we have a family reunion in Iowa in... wait, next month! I was going to write 'in a few months' but no, it's next month. We're going in June.

Ummm, what else? We're having fantastic weather: blue skies and temps in the high 60's to low 70's. Speaking of which, I think I'll close this, head outside and get some Vitamin D! 

Do you have any vacations planned this year? Been on any hikes or walks? Do you have a garden?

Take care!

A Little of This and a Little of That

 Hello!

It feels like it's been longer than a week since I've posted. I hope you all had a blessed Easter and that this week has been a good one.

Our church has a Good Friday service for the adults, and the Kids Team does a Good Friday Experience event downstairs. I opened our classroom and was available for any kids who found the Experience too overwhelming. There was one student who didn't want anything to do with the event so we spent the evening in our room, singing, writing the alphabet and swinging in the swing. The event is amazing though. The classrooms are decorated as the Garden of Gethsemene, the Last Supper, the courtyard where Peter denied Him three times, and there are actors that tell about the events that happen in each area. I wish the adults could go through it! I took a few photos before the kids arrived.

It's really powerful. One of the kids asked 'Peter', "If you were alive when Jesus was, how are you here now?" It truly brings the events of Holy Week to life. 

We went shopping a few weeks ago and Beth bought herself a wooden sign. As it got closer to Easter I decided to buy a couple things so the two of us could paint together. While she slept in I got the table and all the paints ready. She was so happy to come up and paint. And it was fun to have some time together. Sometimes our schedules are so busy we can go a full day or two without seeing each other.

She helped me fix breakfast for dinner one night: pancakes and scrambled eggs. Do you ever do that, have breakfast for dinner? We don't do it very often but we love it!

In April of 2024 a dear friend of mine passed away so I visited his grave last week. Took me a while to find it. And even though I know he wasn't there - he loves the Lord and is face to face with Him now, it was good to be there.

We've had warm, sunny weather the last couple of weeks and it's been so nice! I even bought some flowers yesterday and am hoping to get them planted this weekend. 

Can't think of anything else to write so I'll close this. Take care. Have a good weekend!

His Love for You is Like No Other

 They brought Jesus to the place called Golgotha and they crucified Him. 

The written notice of the charge against Him read: The King of the Jews. 

It was nine in the morning when they crucified Him.

Mark 15:22, 25, 26

When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary mother of James and Salome brought spices to anoint Jesus' body.

When they got there they saw the stone had been rolled away!

A man dressed in white (an angel) told them, "Don't be alarmed, you are looking for Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He is not here. He has risen!

Mark 16:1, 4-6

As we remember His sacrifice on the cross, and celebrate His resurrection this weekend, I pray you experience the tangible presence of the living God.

His love for you is unmatched.

Scary Stuff

 Something happened recently that I haven't told you about. When I took Beth to the doctor a couple weeks ago and the x-ray showed she had bronchitis, they put her on two different antibiotics. One was a z-pack. Take two the first night and one every day after that. When I got back from the pharmacy I gave her the first two and told her to take one the next day and I'd come down to see her when I got home.

Now, I'm working 10-14 hour days. Chuck stopped by the house at lunch to check on her - all was well. 

So that next evening I went down to check on her and noticed the z-pack was on her recliner. An interesting place to put it. When I picked it up it was empty.

"Beth where's the medicine that was in the box?"

She put her head down, no response.

"Beth did you take all of this medicine?"

Without saying anything she opened her desk drawer and began shuffling things around like she was looking for them. I reminded her what it looked like but she never said a word, just kept moving things around her desk drawer. I asked her again, by now my heart is beginning to race.

"Beth did you take all the medicine?"

Again, no response. I checked her forehead but she felt fine. She had been laughing at whatever was on TV, so she was feeling good.

But I went upstairs and called the doctor. It was after hours and when I told the answering service what happened he immediately transferred me to the Poison Control Center. 

That's when I began to cry.

After spending a few minutes talking with her she reassured me that the small dosage Beth had would not cause problems. She might have some bowel issues, maybe a stomach ache, but nothing serious. However, if she does begin to feel dizzy or she faints, call 911.

Needless to say I didn't sleep well that night. Even got up at 3:00 to check on her. She was snorin' like a freight train. (Couldn't wear her c-pap because she was so congested.)

Checked again before I went to work the next morning, still good. I texted her throughout the day and she always texted right back. The doctor called me during the conference - I took the call outside - and she told me that if Beth wasn't having any side effects by now, she was going to be just fine. It might be a week or two until we see her bronchitis improve but she was going to be okay.  

And she has been. Not one single issue. I sometimes wonder if she really did take them. I don't know. I just don't know. I'm just thankful she's okay.

Besides Work and Illness - What We've Been Up To

For the last couple of months Beth would get really congested and she'd be coughing, then she'd begin to feel much better and would go out and about again.

It was during one of these times that we got gym memberships! The first time ever. We've only been able to go a few times but as the weather gets better - and Beth stays better - we're planning to go a couple times a week. With this being our very first membership, we're learning that you have to clean each machine you use. Thankfully they provide the cleaning spray and the towels. It's been really fun and we're looking forward to going more often. 

Have you seen The Chosen? We've watched all four seasons and now season five is in theaters, two episodes each week. When we left the theater last week I told Chuck it helps me understand the culture where it took place. It kind of fills in some missing pieces for me. I know they've taken some creative licensing in some of the storylines but the facts remain true to the gospel. For example - Doubting Thomas. The Bible doesn't tell us why he doubts Jesus is alive, so the creator of The Chosen created a storyline of one possibility of why. But they show the Biblical fact of Thomas having doubts about Christ. We're actually going to see two more episodes later today.

I was given an orchid a few years ago and haven't had a single bloom. I keep moving it from this table to that window and last winter I decided to try one more spot before throwing it away. And guess what?! It bloomed! I'm so glad I finally found a spot it likes!

Beth and I ran errands earlier this week. She was running low on lined paper and was desperate for more. We tried a few stores before finding some at a drug store of all places. She was very unhappy when the Staples in our area closed. She still talks about it every time we drive by where it used to be. After our search, we decided to stop and get a snack and something to drink.

The day before the conference at work, I took some time to go down to the waterfront. We have about 3 miles of coastline that includes beaches, a marina, a dog beach, and the ferry dock. I usually go to the north end of the waterfront but this time I went to the south. The mountains were so clear it felt like you could just reach out and touch them. 

We're so blessed that we get to live here. Just five minutes from the water. I'm just noticing how gray these pictures are! Hahaha! Welcome to Seattle! All the stories are true! 😂

Well, that's about all from here. I hope things are going well with you. Have a good week!

Questions about Beth's Boyfriend and The Hardest Thing About Caregiving

Hey everyone,

The conference at work went well. There were two main sessions, plus break out sessions during the day for the pastors, then one large event in the Sanctuary each evening where people from the congregation could attend. Friday nights event had over 1000 people. It was a glorious night of worship with David and Nicole Binion. They shared their new project The Revelation, and their new song The Letters just wrecked me.

To answer more of your questions - 

One reader asked about Beth's former boyfriend. He and Beth broke up a year or two after covid hit. Honestly, they weren't a good fit. He was very social, and she is very shy. He always talked about the two of them getting married and buying a house but Beth didn't want to do that. She came to me once in tears, "I don't wanna move out of our house!" But she'd never say anything to him about it. They're just very different people. And with covid they ended up not seeing each other for many months so they both decided to just end the relationship.

I sometimes wish she would find a guy that is more her type. Someone she could hang out with, go to dances, and someone to give her special gifts on her birthday and holidays. That is one thing her boyfriend was good at. He was always so thoughtful in the area of gift giving.

Mo asked, "What do you find most difficult about being Beth's full time caregiver?" The first thing that comes to mind is: the speed at which she lives. The word 'hurry' isn't in her vocabulary. She's just wired to do everything at a slower pace than the typical population. It takes her longer than normal to give a verbal response, to brush her teeth, to eat a meal, to get out of the car... The 'R' word is extremely offensive to most, but just like fire retardant slows down a fire, Down Syndrome slows down a person. Her slow speed sometimes makes me so frustrated.

One thing I've learned is to leave her notes. If she has someplace to be, I'll let her know when to wake up, what time to 'be upstairs and ready to walk out the door'. We've used that term for years. 'Be upstairs' doesn't mean she comes upstairs at that time, but that she's upstairs, has her hair done, has gone to the bathroom, has her jacket on, and is completely ready to go at that time. She does really well with these, they've helped a lot!

Another thing that makes caring for her difficult is her lack of communication. She can talk, she just chooses not to. When we're shopping she'll just walk away without saying anything. She won't tell us if she needs something or if she's hurting. It's a constant guessing game, "Beth are you okay?" "Beth is something wrong? Why are you crying?" Like the day I asked her if I could take some pictures of her. She said yes. Then we went outside and...

Every picture was like this. She never did tell me why she was upset. 

I can't help but wonder why she won't talk. I wish I knew. I have lots of theories. I'm trying to change the way I do some things. Adjusting here and there. Parenting is tough. You find yourself second-guessing every decision.

But one thing that is not hard about parenting Beth, is her ability to quickly forgive. That girl can be so mad at you and a few minutes later it's over. She doesn't hold a grudge. She never stays mad for long.  

It's been a journey that's for sure. She's a great lady and I'm thankful she's mine.