And I Cried

When I first found out I told myself I wouldn't cry.

I'm an adult. I can handle this news.

I'm different from everyone else.

Well, I'm not.

And I cried.

I kept wishing the doctor would leave but he didn't.

He just sat on the bed and watched me cry.

He mentioned something about chromosome tests,

But I wasn't really listening.

All I could feel was the pain.

My insides were in a knot.

I had a lump in my throat.

And I cried.

They said she was only showing signs of Down Syndrome.

They would have to do tests to be sure.

We should know in 7 days.

Seven days can be an eternity.

I had almost forgotten about it.

Almost.

The phone rang.

The results are positive?!

It can't be!

They must have the wrong blood cells!

I was stunned.

I hung up the phone.

And I cried.

That began the testing.

The special schools.

Evaluations.

Therapy.

It's been many years since that first week of Beth's life.

I'm still accepting her diagnosis.

Each new day brings reasons for acceptance.

Again and again.

My daughter is a glorious gift from God.

When my love for her overwhelms my heart,

I cry.