Friday, February 15, 2019

Last Visit?

My dad moved in with my sister, gosh, about 8-10 years ago to help them both out financially. Then he was diagnosed with Parkinson's. A couple years ago he started needing 24 hour care and my sister has been doing it every day since. Now he's 94 and his health is deteriorating. I flew down to San Diego last week to see them.

I worked on Thursday and then Chuck and Beth drove me to the airport. My flight actually got in just before midnight! Yawn! I took Super Shuttle from the airport to her house so all she had to go was open the door! I love Super Shuttle!

I planned my trip around my sister's birthday and had called my niece ahead of time so we could plan a small party for her while I was there. My niece and nephew and their families came over for a while. It was loud, but fun to see everyone! Deb was definitely surprised!

My dad gets up usually every 90 minutes throughout the night and I slept on the couch right outside his room so Deb could hopefully get a good nights sleep. He needs help with everything from just standing up to brushing his teeth and fixing meals. My sister does his laundry, prepares his meds, pays his bills and puts him to bed every night. She's sleep deprived and worn out. I was only there for a few days but I wanted to give her just a small break from the non-stop care giving.

My dad isn't a gushy, share your feelings kind of guy but this time he told me over and over how thankful he was that I was there. He told me to tell Chuck 'thank you for letting me come down.'  He was grateful for my help and so thankful Debbie was getting a small break. He knows how much Deb loves him and he was getting emotional when he talked about it.

The morning I left, the shuttle was picking me up at 4am so I was up at 3:00 and my dad woke up a few minutes later. Deb came out to help him while I went into the big bathroom to put on make up and she came in, "Dad's calling for you." He told me again how glad he was that I was there and how good it was to see me. I gave him a gentle hug (he's so skinny) and told him I loved him and that I was so glad I got to come down. 

Deb helped him lay back down and he kept saying how much he loved seeing me. When I was walking out of his room I looked back at him and his eyes were closed but he kept talking, saying he was so thankful...


Saimi said...

Oh Cindy what a wonderful visit. How nice it was for all of you and so perfect to be there for your sisters birthday! Your dad is amazing 90!! WOW!!! I'm sure your sister appreciated your help just as much as your dad did. Family truly is the best!

Regina said...

Cindy I'm so glad you got to spend time with your dad. It sounds like he was so very glad you came to visit too. Your last sentence made me misty eyed. Thank you sharing.

Cranberry Morning said...

I am so glad you got that short visit with your dad and sister. It's hard to even begin to comprehend all that your sister has to deal with each day. But it is good to hear that your dad recognizes that and is thankful. God bless you.

ellen b. said...

So good that you could travel down to see your dad and celebrate your sister's birthday. What a blessing caregivers like your sister are to aging parents. God bless her with strength and I hope she can have some respites.

Barb said...

Hi Cindy~

I'm so glad you went to see him, what a blessing for you, him and your sweet sister. I love that you got to celebrate her birthday as well, I'm sure she loved it! Caretakers are truly very special people, it's something that not everyone can do. You coming to help her for even a short time was probably such a rest for her. Your dad looks like a wonderful man. I think when they are at the end of their life, they really do think more about all the love they have for their children and those who love them. You are very blessed!

Hugs and Love,

Rebecca Jo said...

I know you loved getting to spend time with family & I know your sister had to be so thankful for any kind of rest & some 'time off'... my heart just goes out to all the people who are such good care takers of their family members. That's a tough job to do day in & day out.